First day, high as a kite.
Walked out, had my first fight.
Have to pull it together, I ain't paying,
They'll stop supporting me if I keep failing.
Got a lecture, forgot my stuff.
Before class, had a bit of puff.
Professor's clocked, he's looking at me
Kicked out, in trouble - Whoopsie!
Last night, got completely wasted.
Exam today, guess I'll face it.
Can't even keep my handwriting straight,
Guess failure is just my fate.
Somehow passed, lets go party!
Shit, did I really kiss Marty?
Why am I in this chick's bed,
Positive pregnancy test, filled with dread.
No seriously I'm gay, Why a girl?
Wait, how much is this hotel?
Hold on there are people on the floor,
I seriously don't know what to expect any more.
Nine months later, I get a text.
The baby made from our drunk sex
has been born and she doesn't want it
Hold on wait I'm a father, shit.